Your sex drive will eventually come back after having a baby, but it may take weeks, months, or even years for your libido to return to pre-pregnancy levels
Taking care of your little one, breastfeeding, and rocking them to sleep can be exhausting. At such times, it is normal to have a low sex drive. Your sex drive will eventually come back after having a baby, but it may take weeks, months, or even years.
However long it takes, just remember that this dry spell will not last forever and will eventually go back to pre-pregnancy levels.
What causes low sex drive after having a baby?
Low sex drive after pregnancy can occur due to many factors, including:
- Decreased estrogen levels
- Increased prolactin production
- Lack of sleep
- Perineal pain, soreness, and discomfort
- Vaginal dryness
- Self-consciousness about postpartum body
- Emotional issues such as postpartum depression
7 ways to improve your sex drive after having a baby
- Share the load. Parenting should be the responsibility of both partners. Share the workload equally to make sure that each partner gets some free time to rest and recharge. This can help reduce some of the stress and fatigue that may be putting a damper on your libido.
- Communicate openly. Communication is the key to any successful relationship. If you are tired and worn down, you may not feel like having sex. But instead of ignoring the issue, let your partner know and discuss ways you can make more time for each other.
- Be honest about your feelings. Sometimes, a lack of interest in sex after having a baby may be due to more than just fatigue or physical pain. Many new mothers also have emotional or mental anxieties, whether it’s frustration about being stuck at home all day or stress about other worries. Be honest with yourself and your partner about how you are feeling.
- Bring back the romance. Sometimes, all you need to rev up your sex drive is a little romance. Bring back the spark in your relationship with a candlelit dinner or late-night walk together. You can arrange for a babysitter to look after your baby so that you and your partner can have quality time together.
- Find other ways to connect. Intimacy is not all about sex. If sex is too uncomfortable or exhausting to think about, reconnect with your partner in other ways, whether it’s kissing, cuddling, or even holding hands. You can also explore other sexually pleasurable activities, such as oral sex, mutual masturbation, or sensual massages.
- Schedule time for sex. Although the idea of scheduling your sex sessions may not seem as sexy, sometimes it becomes necessary after having a baby. Your first year with your newborn is physically and emotionally taxing, and you may have to schedule time in between naps or feedings in order to make sure you are also prioritizing your sex life.
- Address the issue sooner rather than later. Having a child completely changes your world. Nothing will be the same as it was before. If you and partner allow sex to fall by the wayside for too long, it can lead to tension or feelings of dissatisfaction. Try to address the issue earlier before it drives a wedge in your relationship.
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Medically Reviewed on 4/18/2022
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