Tips for Parenting a Child with ADHD (cont.)Medical Author:
Melissa Conrad Stöppler, MD
Melissa Conrad Stöppler, MDMelissa Conrad Stöppler, MD, is a U.S. board-certified Anatomic Pathologist with subspecialty training in the fields of Experimental and Molecular Pathology. Dr. Stöppler's educational background includes a BA with Highest Distinction from the University of Virginia and an MD from the University of North Carolina. She completed residency training in Anatomic Pathology at Georgetown University followed by subspecialty fellowship training in molecular diagnostics and experimental pathology. Medical Editor:
Roxanne Dryden-Edwards, MD
Roxanne Dryden-Edwards, MDDr. Roxanne Dryden-Edwards is an adult, child, and adolescent psychiatrist. She is a former Chair of the Committee on Developmental Disabilities for the American Psychiatric Association, Assistant Professor of Psychiatry at Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore, Maryland, and Medical Director of the National Center for Children and Families in Bethesda, Maryland. In this Article
Set small, attainable goalsThink of changing your child's less positive behaviors like training for a marathon. Just like no one would expect you or anyone else to go from never running at all to completing 26+ miles, it is unfair and unrealistic to expect your child to change 15, 10, or even five behaviors immediately. Don't expect dramatic changes overnight. If your goal is to have your child sit still politely through a restaurant meal or family outing, break the process down into small and attainable goals like not interrupting a conversation for five minutes, remaining seated for 10 minutes, etc. Be sure to offer plenty of praise and rewards when these small goals are met. Focus on one or two challenging behaviors at a timeChanging all of a child's negative behaviors at once is never possible, and attempting to do so can create unbearable stress for both parent and child, setting both up for failure. Instead, pick one or two challenging behaviors that you'd like to improve and focus on those. Examples might be interrupting, not remaining seated, forgetting to put toys away, or arguing about bedtime. Whichever behaviors you choose to modify, understand the behavior changes must be gradual to be successful over time. Create a system of nonmonetary rewards and fair, swift consequences as described above and stick to it. You might offer the child a larger privilege or reward (for example, going to bed a half hour later one weekend night) when the behavior has been eliminated or significantly reduced (such as a complete week of putting away toys properly). Don't forget to praise the small successes along the way. Find areas in which the child excels or succeeds
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No one enjoys being subjected to constant criticism or complaints about their behavior. As every individual needs to feel good at something, constant criticizing can result in the child unwittingly working more at perfecting negative behaviors they get attention for rather than the positive behaviors if he or she is not praised. Help your child find an area or interest in which he or she is successful. This can be a sport, musical instrument, academic subject, art form, or other hobby. Even less defined strengths like public speaking, constructive debating skills, or getting along with their peers or adults can promote the child's success and are therefore worthy of praise. Being successful or having a strong interest in a hobby can greatly improve your child's self-esteem and well-being. Many parents have found that martial arts classes that combine physical movement with mental discipline training are helpful for their kids with ADHD. However, there is no single "best" activity for children with ADHD. Let their interests and enthusiasm be your guide. Reviewed by Roxanne Dryden-Edwards, MD on 2/29/2012 Patient CommentsViewers share their comments
Parenting a Child with ADHD - Symptoms
Question: Describe the symptoms associated with your child's ADHD.
Parenting a Child with ADHD - Strategies
Question: Please provide some tips and strategies that have been helpful in parenting a child with ADHD.
Parenting a Child with ADHD - Success
Question: In what areas does your child with ADHD excel? How did you help your child find his/her passion?
Parenting a Child with ADHD - Distractions
Question: How have you dealt with or eliminated distractions for your child with ADHD?
Parenting a Child with ADHD - Healthy Lifestyle
Question: Please discuss how you changed your child's diet or lifestyle to manage symptoms of ADHD.
Parenting a Child with ADHD - Caring for Yourself
Question: Parenting a child with ADHD can be challenging. In what ways do you find time for yourself?
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