Feng Shui: Helping With Harmony & Tranquility (cont.)

Moderator: So you recommend not reading in bed?

Melendez: That's a hard one -- I wish I could get out of that personally, but I do that, too. I have found that if you read in another room and go to bed, you'll get to bed a lot quicker because you've programmed your mind that when you get into the bedroom, it's about sleep. It's a good one to do if you can. Research has shown that people that watch TV right before bed have a higher rate of depression. What happens is when you turn off the TV set, there's electromagnetic energy coming out of the TV set even when its off. Mirrors in the bedroom also affect sleep. They're too active for the bedroom.

Moderator: Wouldn't you need mirrors in the bedroom for dressing, etc.?

Melendez: In most of the architecture we have here in the West, oftentimes the bathroom is adjoined to the bedroom, or a lot of times people have these mirrored closets, and those are people that have the biggest amount of insomnia because they can't get to bed. Energy comes in and, although it's invisible, it beams off the mirrors and starts circulating through the room. Once again, you have to live it. When I first started studying Feng Shui, I didn't know if I believed in the mirrors. I took them all out of my bedroom because I wanted to see if it was true, and I noticed that I did sleep better when all the mirrors were out of the bedroom. I feel so much better not having it there. A lot of the stuff that comes out, you have to live it and try it, because if you never try it, you'll never know if it'll work for you. Some information will resonate, but at least try it.

tuesday1_WebMD I have successfully banned the TV from the bedroom, but we are still living amongst boxes from when we moved in 9 months ago.

Melendez: First of all, until you and your husband unpack the boxes... what you're trying to do is create a home and roots. Every night you go to bed, it's like you still haven't completed moving in yet. In the back of your mind, you're still thinking of the boxes and how you still have to unpack. Until you unpack, you probably won't fully feel that you have a new space, and that you own the space. So it's really important; I suggest ... even though you're moving into your space, try to get them out of the bedroom and into the living room, so you're forced to go through it. Not dealing with it doesn't make it not go away, and if the boxes haven't been used for 9 months, there's probably stuff that you don't need. Those might be some items to let go of.

tuesday1_WebMD If magnetism is related to restful sleep, do you think that sleeping on a magnetic pad is helpful?

Melendez: It's awesome. I do energy work on people, and there are many clients ranging from professional athletes to people who have major arthritis or ailments. And I know they have magnetic mattresses and pillows.. and the magnets help to balance the body and help to absorb pain. And the magnetic mattress is amazing.

Moderator: Where can I get a magnetic pad?

Melendez: I was at Macy's a while ago, and I know they had magnetic items there... but I don't know if they had a magnetic pad. But they have magnetic pillows and things like that, so I'm sure they have access to it.

tuesday1_WebMD My husband tells me that when he was single he lived with boxes and newspapers for almost a year. So he is improving. Slooowly. He is just a packrat. Or dysfunctional when it comes to "stuff'.

Melendez: First of all, he's not single anymore. What happens is that when he's looking at those boxes, he remembers that's how he used to be when he was single. So I suggest getting rid of the boxes, because when he's in a marriage and committed relationship like now, he's not a bachelor anymore and sharing his space with somebody else. In this area, you might need to be the one that has the encouragement type energy... you might need to assist him with "hey, can we put this in a box of 'let's think about' and put it in the garage downstairs?" You might need to take the initiative there.

tuesday1_WebMD We don't unpack because we are too tired at the end of the day, and too busy on weekends. And because I am the only one who cares about unpacking.

Melendez: This is the whole thing about life -- it all comes to priorities. For me personally, when my home is not in order, everything in my life is chaos. Because our house and space is a mirror of who we are. I haven't seen too many people with chaotic homes and a lot of stuff, be really organized and completely together outside of that... because you're living two worlds. You have to start somewhere, and usually our home is our root and the base of where we come to feel safe and regenerate ourselves. And if our space doesn't feel comfortable and right, how can we get to the next level of where we want to be? You have to get your roots and base ground situated before you can get to the next step. So I realize that this takes a lot of time, and I understand that completely. But it'll be the best time you can spend... even if you take one night a week to address it. You'll be able to make a lot of strides, you'll feel so good.

tuesday1_WebMD Thank you. You are definitely on the no junk camp. There is a strong 'junk is good" camp in my household.

Moderator: If I have a door in my relationships area, will I have trouble with men who cheat or will want to leave? How can I remedy this situation?

Melendez: Folklore says that if you're a woman and you have a mirror in your bedroom, there's a high likelihood that a third party will enter the relationship. A lot of people ask if their mate is cheating on them... and one of the biggest things is that most of the people who ask this have a lot of mirrors in their bedroom.

tuesday1_WebMD I think I just need a maid! Someone neutral that will just do it. Sorry to highjack your feng shui discussion with my packrattiness.