Orgasms: Becoming a Multi-Orgasmic Woman (cont.)

Other breathing and visualization techniques allow women to enhance the desire they feel in their body and as I described previously, move the energy up their spine and around their body so the desire is not simply concentrated in their sexual organs, but is distributed throughout their body. This both enhances pleasure and acts as a healing force to the body as a whole.

Both Western medicine and Daoism believe and have documented that sexuality is very healing to the body when done in a loving way. Much research has been done on sexuality showing that it burns many calories, boosts metabolism, improves immune functions, improves sleep, relieves menstrual cramps and relieves depression. In older adults, those who are sexually active -- when we control for other illnesses -- are much healthier and live longer. Some of this effect may be from the hormones that are released from sexual activity. For example, PEA is a hormone that is high in early romance and causes giddiness and excitement. It is low in people who are depressed. This hormone is released with orgasm, giving us a natural high. DHEA is known as the "antiaging" hormone and is known to protect the immune system and perhaps prevent chronic disease and it also peaks with orgasm. This will be no surprise to most women, but oxytocin, referred to as the "bonding" hormone, increases with genital stimulation, nipple stimulation and intercourse. It promotes touch and affectionate behavior, leading to that postsex cuddling behavior that most of us love. It also promotes relaxation and happiness. Unfortunately it decreases cognition and impairs memory, but at that point, who cares?

For women who are menopausal, staying sexually active releases estrogen and testosterone which helps with hot flashes, maintains sex drive and vaginal lubrication.

The Daoists believed that sexual energy was the most potent healing force in the body, and indeed, I have spoken with many advanced practitioners who not only feel well and seem to age very slowly, but have actually miraculously healed illnesses by circulating sexual energy to a particular part of their body.

What is Daoism?

Daoism is an ancient Chinese comprehensive physical and spiritual system that helps individuals reach their highest potential. It has been present for three to five thousand years in China and is most familiar to people in the West, as the medical tradition which includes acupuncture, Chinese herbs as well as the exercise and meditative practices Tai Chi and Chi Kung. It also includes a tradition of nutrition and massage. The sexual practice was simply considered another important aspect of one's health.

Do these techniques work if your sexual experiences are "solo" or do they work better with a partner willing to experiment? Or must you have a partner willing to experiment?

I am so glad you asked that question. The Multi-Orgasmic Woman is written so you can do every exercise in the book alone or with a partner. It works with a partner if your partner is willing to learn himself (or herself) or even if your partner is uninterested. It is a lot more fun to have a partner who is also doing the practice. We also have a book for men called The Multi-Orgasmic Man . But it is not necessary that your partner do this practice.

I usually recommend that women begin doing these exercises alone as it's easier to concentrate. Masturbation in the Taoist tradition is called self-cultivation and is considered an important part of maintaining one's health, libido, and general passion and enjoyment of life.

I am in a committed relationship with another woman. Do you have any special advice for us?

Have fun! These exercises are absolutely appropriate for lesbian couples and The Multi-Orgasmic Woman is written to embrace all women, no matter who their partner is. Most of the advice that applies to heterosexual couples is the same for lesbian couples.

One of the fun parts of working with lesbian couples is giving them new tools and exercises by which they can explore new vaginal hot spots. I often tell my heterosexual couples that although an erect penis is nice, it is not necessary for sexual fulfillment for women and in fact, most of the vaginal hot spots are more easily reached with fingers.

"When a woman learns how to be fulfilled sexually, it enhances her passion for living in a much deeper way."

Can you give more detail about vaginal hot spots?

The most famous vaginal pleasure zone is the G-spot, which is located approximately one to two knuckles inside the vagina on the front side of a woman's body, typically just at or just beyond her pubic bone. It can be difficult to feel this area unless you are very aroused. It is ideal to have already had an orgasm, typically from clitoral stimulation, which causes the G-spot to swell and become more prominent. Typically it is a bumpier feel than the rest of the vagina which is smooth. It is difficult to stimulate fully during intercourse and easiest to stimulate with fingers.

Another important vaginal pleasure zone which some women are not aware of is the anterior fornix erotic zone, or AFE zone. It is also located on the front of the body, but is deep in the vagina, just on the front side of the cervix. This area can be stimulated with deep penetration with a dildo or penis and sometimes with fingers.

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