Know When to Hold 'Em
Know When To Hold 'Em
Ask my 15-year-old if she knows any spoiled kids, and she'll rattle off a slew of examples (with a hint of envy): one friend whose parents gave her a $2,000 shopping spree, another who got a new car at 16 ... you get the picture. But if you're the parent of a newborn, don't sweat it, at least not yet. You can't spoil a baby.
Contrary to popular myth, it's impossible for parents to hold or respond to a baby too much, child development experts say. Infants need constant attention to give them the foundation to grow emotionally, physically and intellectually.
"A challenge of the newborn is getting to know that the world is somehow reliable and trustworthy, that his or her basic needs will be met," says J. Kevin Nugent, director of the Brazelton Institute at Children's Hospital in Boston and a child psychologist.
Responding to baby's cues "isn't a matter of spoiling," he says. "It's a matter of meeting the child's needs."
Myth No. 1: Let Her Cry a Little
When your baby cries -- and the typical infant will cry about three hours a day in the first three months, more if she has colic -- it isn't because she's trying to manipulate you. She hasn't learned how to do that yet. She's crying because she's hungry, tired, lonely or plain uncomfortable, and that's her only way of letting you know.