Patient Comments: Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) - Experience

Please describe your experience with obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD).

Comment from: RaeLuv04, 25-34 Female (Patient) Published: October 07

I always collect unwanted things but I always hesitate to throw them away because I feel that something bad is going to happen to my family. I'm always counting so many times when washing my hands and I always touch things over and over again until it feels right. I open and close the door several times. I turn the light switch off and on like 16 or 17 times just to keep things from happening to the ones I love. I always check for things. I am fighting this and it's pretty hard. I repeat myself alot. It's kinda hard but I'm getting help and I'm getting a little bit better.

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Comment from: Zoey2358, 45-54 Female (Patient) Published: October 07

I suffer from OCD and I have for years. I have the obsessive thoughts and strive to do things perfectly when I do something. I am always apolizing for the things I do, because I feel like a burden at times because of the way I am. I need constant reassurance in a relationship that things are ok and that they are not going to leave me. I expect things to be the same way everyday and when they are not it causes anxiety and most of day sis pent crying. This is an awful disorder to live with and somedays I am so tired of being this way and being afraid, I will drive people away, because I am always saying I am sorry for not doing things right and other things I do. I just started taking Cymbalta and I am hoping this may relieve some of my symptons.

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Comment from: ART, 35-44 Female (Patient) Published: October 07

OCD has been part of my life for about 5 years. In the beginning I didn't think it was a big deal that I counted my steps and that I needed to always double check everything I did. 2 years ago is when I realized that this was not ok and it was not going away. Actually with time it only got worse. I had my second child at the age of 30. During the pregnancy I obessed about getting sick all the time. I spent much of my time in the hospital. I didnt realize it at the time but, now I see that I really made myself feel sick because of my fear and thoughts of falling sick. I remember once, I went to the emergency room and I told the nurse that I was having hot flashes and that I was going to faint. I will never forget this. The nurse at this point had me hooked up to the heart monitor and blood pressure/oxygen monitor, and she looked at those devices as I was saying that I was going to faint and then she looked and me and said, your vital signs are all normal, I dont understand why you are feeling so bad. I will get the doctor in any case. I looked at my husband and he said, you need to relax. I was very insultated that he didn't believe me but I now realize that its true. The more I would think of being sick, the more anxious I would become and at the end I would panic an go to the hospital. After my son was born, things got better for a while until I started working. I felt so guilty everyday when I would leave my baby at daycare that I could hardly concentrate at work. I lost my job because of it and I was anxious and having too many panic attacks. I stayed home but it got much worst and very bad and invasive thoughts started running through my brain and before I knew it, I was out of control. I couldn't eat, sleep, drive,... live life. I was afraid of myself around my baby and just wanted to be alone with my horrible thoughts in my room where I couldn't hurt anyone. Finally my husband took me to the emergency and after being examined by a wonderful psychiatrist for at least 2 hours, she finally was able to put me a bit at ease as fas as explaining that these thoughts did not mean that I was a bad person or was going to do somehting bad. These were a result of so much worry about my baby that it pretty much took over the confidence I had in myself as a mother / wife etc... I have been on sertraline for 1 1/2 years and unfortuately, I had a "relapse" a month ago and lost another job as a result of it. I am not on an increased dosage of sertraline and so far so good. I wish everyone luck in facing this challenge of OCD. I think the worst part of it is that people "employers especially" just think that you are lazy or that you have "issues" as if you chose to have this kind of intrusion in your life.

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Comment from: woman of god, 25-34 Female (Patient) Published: October 07

I have been struggling with OCD since I was about sixteen. At first I did not know what was wrong with me. I always had a fear of going crazy or just losing control all of a sudden. I have suffered for years from bad thoughts and repetitive thinking. At one point I started checking doors to make sure they were locked or always counting to three. Finally, I was able to stop my self from these stupid rituals but I was still having bad and repetitive thoughts. I finally had a break down on my way to work at age 23. I told my husband everything I had been keeping from him for fear he would leave me. I am happy to say he did not leave me and he has shown me nothing but unconditional love as well as my 2 beautiful children. Not saying we don't have our ups and downs but like it is said by Peter in the bible, love is a strong as death love conquers all. I am on Zoloft as well as a nerve pill right that I have been taking on and off since I was 23. My hope for the future is to be totally drug free.

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Comment from: polaris, 55-64 Male (Patient) Published: October 07

I find myself counting things, cows in a field, birds, tiles on a wall, tiles on floor, anything that has a number connected to it. I am not sure how or why I do this, I tell myself to stop counting and look away. Taking generic Celexa - citalopram 40 mg.

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Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) - Treatments Question: What was the treatment for your obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD)?
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) - Symptoms Question: What symptoms do you experience with your obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD)?
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) - Risks Question: Do you have a relative with OCD? If so, do you believe there's a genetic risk for developing the condition?

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