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February 10, 2012

Patient Discussions: Bulimia - Describe Your Experience

Question:Please describe your experience with bulimia.

Comment from: 13-18 Female (Patient) Published: November 19

I am 14 years old and have been bulimic for a few months. I do not feel it has yet taken over my life. However I do feel that when I eat I must throw up or I am going to get fat so maybe it has taken over? I don't know. But I do know that my sister has suffered from this disease and that she is staring to realize what is going on. I have only told one person "my best friend", and I don't plan on telling anyone else. I play softball and believe that I am fat although others disagree. So far I have went from about 147 to 134 which I wouldn't say is bad. (I'm 5'5). I do not wish anyone would start doing this, but at the same time I believe it's MY body and MY life and I should be able to do what I want with it. I just don't want anyone like my family members to find out and I am afraid that my sister will tell! What should I do? You can only save the ones that want to be saved, and I'm not one of them. Although I don't want to have to throw up after eating meals. I do not want to get FAT again. I'm done with it. In a day I will eat a piece of toast in the morning, nothing for the afternoon, and dinner. I do realize this is not a good thing to do and again I am not saying anyone should start, but I do know that this is how I want to live my life for the moment. I hate my body just not my life.

Comment from: Shh!, 19-24 Female (Patient) Published: November 10

I am 19 years old and have been bulimic since I was 13 years old. My mom found out a few months after I first started and basically told me to stop. The day after my mom confronted me, my dad asked me if I wanted to join a gym or get on SlimFast; he never really admitted to knowing. They have never mentioned it since. I stopped for a few weeks and started again. I got really depressed, and at 15 got into drugs. Eventually at 17, I was put in jail for four months. My boyfriend for only three months at the time visited me every week, and now we are married. I am now clean and on probation, but I am still bulimic. I came across this submission while doing a research paper for my psychology class, and I told my husband my real reason for choosing this topic. It was the first time I spoke about it in five years; the only time. I couldn't tell him it still happens, and I know I need more help. I am so easily agitated sometimes and freak out under pressure. If things aren't going just right, I just cry sometimes, and if I get angry, I seem so out of control. I know it's not “normal me” and my husband jokes that I am crazy, but it's not so funny for me. I don't want to do this anymore, and I just had to let someone know.

Comment from: abercrombie 0840, 13-18 Female (Patient) Published: November 10

I am 18 years old and I have non purging bulimia. First it started off where I would run 2 miles before school in the morning. During lunch at school I would throw my moms lunch away and buy a granola bar maybe some water. After school I would go to cross country practice where we'd run at least 10 miles 5 days a week. To make up for weekends without practice I would run around our large park 7 times in place of practice. At night I would go home and have a salad and run 2 more miles. I was almost anorexic. It's been 2 years since this has started. Now I can't control how much I eat and I'm gaining weight. My dad used to force me to eat and now he's hiding the food around the house so I don't eat everything. I still continue to run, but lost interest somewhat and mope around and cry at how much I've binged. It's a severe mental disorder that I'll forever live with, I only hope that I can learn that food is just food. I need to eat the proper amount and proper kinds of food to stay healthy and only exercise to be healthy. It's a battle that seems impossible, but look at all the people who can do it.

Related Reading: bulimia

Comment from: Jamiej, 45-54 Female Published: October 15

I first started throwing up when I was 13; I quit during my pregnancies and began after the babies were born. I tried controlling my eating behaviors through many diets and exercise. None of these things helped me for any long periods of time because I would once again lose it. I got a divorce, met a man that told me he didn't need me to stay skinny for him and he didn't want me doing this to myself. I quit throwing up, but the pattern of over-eating is so impulsive I could quit over-eating. I keep trying different diets and occasional exercises only to fail time after time and binge eat again. It seems to be the only thing that makes my brain happy. I don't throw up anymore, but I still have the seemingly uncontrollable impulse to binge eat. I am now in my later 40's and I am mildly obese. I can see myself becoming worse over the years. I have been on many different anti-depressants over the years. They say that these can help, but they don't seem to have helped me stop the impulses that go on in my brain. I don't see anything stopping this roller coaster. Please listen to me girls and ladies alike. The mental problem this causes is just as bad as or worse than any of the physical problems. Please don't start it.

Comment from: 13-18 Female Published: October 15

I am 18 years old and have been bulimic for almost 9 years. I have always struggled with it but for the past year it has completely taken over my life. I am 5'6 and used to weigh about 130. I lost 18 pounds in three weeks. That was easy I just had to buckle down and throw up after every meal. Then I got to my lowest point of 107 by throwing up and using laxatives. I was extremely unhealthy and kept fainting and having chest pain. I am still extremely unhealthy no one knows I am bulimic my mom takes me to the doctor on a regular basis because she doesn't understand what is happening to me she would never think that I am bulimic even though eating disorders run in my family. My poor boyfriend of a year and a half is so worried about my health. He always jokes around that I'm bulimic I think he knows, but he doesn't know how serious it is. I don't know how to get help and I don't know if I want it because I like being skinny. I need help my body is slowly dying and I don't know what to do.

Related Reading: fainting | chest pain


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Suggested Reading on Bulimia by Our Doctors

  • Related Diseases & Conditions

    • Anorexia
      • Anorexia is an eating disorder characterized by markedly reduced appetite or total aversion to food. Anorexia is a serious psychological disorder and is a condition that goes well beyond out-of-control dieting. With anorexia, the drive to become thinner is actually secondary to concerns about control and/or fears relating to one's body. There are psychological and behavioral symptoms as well as physical symptoms of anorexia including: depression, social withdrawal, fatigue, food obsession, heart and gastrointestinal complications, kidney function, flaky skin, brittle nails, and tooth loss (this list is not exhaustive).
    • Suicide
      • Suicide is the process of intentionally ending one's own life. Approximately 1 million people worldwide commit suicide each year, and 10 million to 20 million attempt suicide annually.
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      • Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) is an anxiety disorder that causes a person to suffer repeated obsessions and compulsions. Symptoms include irresistible impulses despite a person's realization that the thoughts are irrational, excessive hand washing, skin picking, lock checking, or repeatedly rearranging items. People with OCD are more likely to develop trichotillomania, muscle or vocal tics, or an eating disorder. Treatment for OCD includes psychotherapy, behavioral therapy, and medication.
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      • Fatigue can be described in various ways. Sometimes fatigue is described as feeling a lack of energy and motivation (both mental and physical). The causes of fatigue are generally related to a variety of conditions or diseases for example, anemia, mono, medications, sleep problems, cancer, anxiety, heart disease, drug abuse, and more. Treatment of fatigue is generally directed toward the condition or disease that is causing the fatigue.
    • Mental Illness
      • Mental illness is any disease or condition affecting the brain that influence the way a person thinks, feels, behaves, and/or relates to others. Mental illness is caused by heredity, biology, psychological trauma and environmental stressors.
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      • Characteristics of binge eating disorder include eating more quickly than usual, eating until uncomfortably full, eating a lot of food despite not being hungry, eating alone due to embarrassment, and feeling disgusted by overeating. Depression may be a cause of binge eating disorder. Risks of binge eating include weight gain, diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, heart disease, and some cancers.
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